2006-05-23 - 6:31 a.m.
Let's go into the lobby, and get ourselves some TOYS!
Today, we're all about the consumerism. I've mentioned before that we get every catalogue known to man, but when I can't find what I'm looking for, I know that there's always the warm, wild, intarweb - thousands, nay, millions, of sites willing to sell me all manner of strange things. Mind you, I don't use this stuff myself; I prefer to torture my friends with it. Alas, I am currently on a budget because I'm saving up to selfishly buy myself oodles of nice things when I go to England at the end of June, so I'm not buying things for any of you. But if I could, here's what I'd buy... Gen, you should probably be glad I'm not buying you yet *more* ladybug stuff (I'm saving that for England, where they call them "ladybirds", and they all have cute accents), but if I was in the mood to buy you MoL paperweights, this is what I'd get - Ladybug bean bags (a whole dozen). A bargain at the price, and cute! Wendy, I suggested in your guestbook the other day that it sounded like it was time to distribute toys at work again - well, these look like hours of fun - colour your own space magnets. Fuzzy! Or even these - space name tags. Now your team can all write passive-aggressive things on their name tags, like "Hello, my name is OVERWORKED", and "WE DON'T NEED NO STINKIN' BUDGET!". Cosette, this one's for you - Day of the Dead coasters. You know, because you can never have too many skulls. And for the rest of you, there are treats galore if you know where to look: Stop Sign stickers - for those of you who feel that urban vandalism should be clever and funny, not pedantic and self-righteous. Or maybe some movie manners courtesy cards - for those times when you're feeling too passive-aggressive to say "shh!", but are secretly boiling over with rage at the asshat behind you who has to describe the whole movie to the person sitting next to them even thought they're RIGHT THERE WATCHING IT WITH THEM. *ahem* If you're feeling a bit more aggressive, try the Urban Asshole notification cards - a great way to tell everyone else how they can't possibly live up to your standards, and they're jerks just for breathing in your space. (I plan to stock up on these. Just in case.) But maybe aggression and snark tactics aren't your thing - perhaps you're more of the fun-toys-to-throw-at-your-friends type. Well, this fish is for you. Inflatable, friendly, no sharp edges. Perfect for fish tanks that kill other fish - no water required! Speaking of fish, here's a favourite from my childhood: Fortune Teller Fish. I *loved* these cheap little toys - they can tell you what mood you're in (if you weren't certain), and they're fun, interactive little bits of vinyl. Happy shopping, everyone!
Dorsal - Ventral
Funnier than me: James Lileks disclaimer!
all words copyright Laura Mellin 2000-2005
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